Thursday, September 6, 2012

Rolling through the Setbacks & Failures, Strategies to provide insurance towards Success

Sir Winston Churchill said that, “Success is the ability to go from one failure to another without loss of enthusiasm.”

Managing the boat (your life) through the storms of life, and still having  sea-worthy  boat takes skill, and guts. The experiences make you stronger, and you learn how to be a more deft sailor.  I know what it feels like to experience setback after setback, one failure after another. (Remember the surfer blog post and the constant waves coming my way?) I also know what it feels like to wallow in the mire. To sulk. Regret and resentment? They  lead to acute chronic depression.  Our time is very valuable. We cannot change the past, but only try to be in the present. Therefore, looking back as you walk forward robs yourself, and all others of your true self. Life sucks at this point.

Quick fixes:

Releasing this emotional baggage can be done by using acupressure (google eft mercola for more info), meditation (scientific evidence shows it is a rapid EF skill booster), talking with a therapist, or loved one, are also great weighs to process emotions. Likewise look into Cranial Sacral Therapist. I have done this about five times and I felt immediate physical/ emotional relief. I would be a fool’s fool not to mention prayer also. There is growing scientific evidence showing that people who pray (talk to God) regularly, even daily, have a greater sense of direction, and satisfaction in their life. This equates to higher and higher degrees of contentment. Contentment makes the sense of failure to fly away. Only, pray in your own words, ask Him to be reminded to pray, and do it often. Be patient.

Setbacks and failures can cause real pain, of course.  But we have no option, but to move on, especially if we are supporting a family, or others depend on us. In that case, focusing on failure, sulking in it even, is selfish. Parenting can be helpful in keeping you on the surfboard this way.  One strategy for coping with failure is to set aside 10-15 minutes a day to grieve over a failure in life. Go for it. After that set allotted time, its time to roll up your sleeves, break out a smile, and spring back up.  That way you are not half grieving all day long. You are more present in the moment. Give yourself the time to get it out of your system. Keeping the grief in check needs to happen though..

Finally, another great strategy is to strengthen your executive functions skills. Your ability to orchestrate, direct, and manage yourself, across a spectrum of twenty five or so known skills. These include focusing, sustaining attention, starting and finishing tasks, managing your time, organization (in its many forms), self-regulation, and working memory. There is a wealth of info online. You can also consult, or work with an Executive Functions Coach. This special coach, who should have a special education (or at least education-related background), becomes your defacto frontal lobe and takes a look at various strengths and deficits, then works with you on improving them. To ensure that the EF program is effective, bringing in a tutor who can be present daily helps guide and steer the student to take ownership of the program.

Next time I will be talking about making a student profile sheet for each student during the first week of school. Benefits, as well as particulars it should include.

For more, go to http://www.CoachBill.US
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